Category Archives: Ironic Humor

When Do I Get Paroled?

Published / by Lee Kessler / Leave a Comment

In a country of laws and Due Process, the criminal—after he is arrested, tried, convicted, and sentenced–knows how long his sentence is, and, most importantly, when he will be eligible for parole.  If he is good, and behaves himself, he can reenter the society at the time of parole.

So, here is my question. HOW LONG DO I HAVE TO BE HEALTHY AND NOT GET COVID BEFORE I AM PAROLED?  Is it 2 years (already passed)?   Is it 5?  Is it until I am 90?  If I am still Covid-free when I die, will you parole me posthumously?  Will you even consider the tiniest possibility that you were perhaps wrong, or misinformed yourself? 

You may ask, paroled from what?  From excoriation, discrimination, ridicule, censorship, and exclusion from the freedoms I once had.  And what am I guilty of?   Being healthy!   And, being scientifically curious!

Under Due Process also, the inmate gets to appeal his conviction.   He gets to challenge whether he was fairly and honestly convicted. New evidence may surface and be presented. My fellow countrymen, you know the drill here.  So, here is my question—on behalf of millions of us.  WHY CAN’T WE ASK QUESTIONS ABOUT THE VIRUS, AND ITS ORIGINS—IF FOR NO OTHER REASON THAN FOR PREVENTION IN THE FUTURE?  Why can’t we have questions about vaccines? Why can’t we favor therapeutics over vaccines like we do with most other diseases?

The bottom line is that intellectual curiosity is warranted.  It is the American thing.  Intellectual integrity demands it. That too is an American thing.  No one can trust self-proclaimed authorities who lack intellectual integrity.  No one.

So what do you say?  Parole your fellow Americans and start talking to one another.   Start asking honest questions.  And demand honest answers from those “authorities.”  That too is the American thing.

Leo Terrell

Published / by Lee Kessler / Leave a Comment

Some years back when I was living in Los Angeles, I heard a liberal black civil rights attorney being interviewed about some case, and the journalist wanted him to weigh in.

I had heard his name before, and knew he was a prominent trial attorney, specializing in civil rights cases, and also a talk radio host. So, I listened. Now, understand that Leo Terrell and I would not likely agree on much–or so I thought. But, I remember distinctly saying to myself, “Well, if I ever get into trouble and need an attorney, I would want Leo Terrell to defend me!”

The reason? His obvious passion, which I felt however was accompanied by a keen intellect, and knowledge of the law. But, more important, I felt he had a strong personal integrity. He was who he appeared to be. He yelled a lot, but he was no self-serving faker. His emotion was not righteous indignation whipped up to get camera time. I felt it was true “righteous indignation.” Whatever the issue, I sensed he believed every word he was saying, and that he would stand behind his words.

Bottom line, I trusted him, even if I did not particularly like him. His style is so very different from my own. His politics so very different from my own. The world he operates in so very different from my own.

Yet, still, he is the one oddly enough I felt could best represent me, if I needed a fierce and compassionate advocate. Fortunately, I have not needed Leo Terrell’s services.

But, today, our nation needs him. So, my friends, if you want to know about Black Lives Matter–who they really are, and what they are really doing–I am going to direct you to Leo Terrell. I will let him do my talking for me. And I will let him tell you how he feels about the men and women in blue–the 98 percent. He has dealt with them for decades.

This way, you can’t dismiss the information as the misguided prattle of a “white privileged, systemically racist” veteran actress and author. (Just a little ironic humor there.) You, too, may find that you have a lot more in common with Leo Terrell than you ever dreamed–especially if you are principled and consistent. Most especially if you know your history.

The Black Robes of Judgment

Published / by Lee Kessler / 3 Comments on The Black Robes of Judgment

Almost 40 years ago, my first business mentor used to say, “Take the black robes off…” At first I did not know what he meant. Then I realized he was referencing the black robes that judges wear in courtrooms. And that he was humorously preparing me to receive information or guidance that he knew to be what we would call today “politically incorrect.”

Fortunately for me he knew that even if something isn’t comfortable to talk about, or even if it challenges the current wisdom, and acceptance by the general population, that does not mean it should not be talked about. And further, it does not mean that it is not true.

So, I learned to take off the black robes of judgment and just listen. There were many times when emotions would rise up in me as I did so. There were times when I did not want to listen anymore to him, and wanted to walk away. But, a still small voice within me whispered, “he’s right.”

To admit he was right meant I had to be willing to change. As I did, I affirmed for myself that he had in fact been right all along, and thank God had had the courage to tell me what needed to be said. Much of what I know about government, life, and economics I learned during his talks. The truths have stood the test of time. And each opened the door to more analytical research, and more truths.

He was right. And, I was simply ignorant.

It is time for many Americans to take off the black robes of judgment, settle down their emotions, and stop dramatizing their reactions to current events.

Most of us are sick to death of watching destruction, vandalism, and self-righteous pronouncements and disregard for the rule of law. We have had enough. And that includes having enough of the political establishment.

Hiding behind a good and righteous cause, they have all but obscured the validity of that cause by their disrespect at best, and treachery at worst. In the novel “White King and the Doctor” I laid out what I believed was to be a strategy a very real enemy would use against us all. That strategy was this: take America’s strengths and turn them into weaknesses. Take that First Amendment in particular, with all of its 5 Freedoms, and turn each one into something that actually destroys us and our culture.

Further, I laid out that mind control would be used to get us to turn from righteousness to self-righteousness. And, in so doing, all manner of “crimes” can be committed in the name of “righteousness.”

In our self-righteous zeal we are wiping out all remnants of history that don’t conform with one’s current view of the world–albeit a view formed by people who are still living in their parents’ basements, acting like Rip Van Winkles who just woke up. Regrettably, most are only in their 20’s now, and that would have made them toddlers and kindergartners when they went to sleep. Can we really expect the “woke” children to exercise rational thought?

A nation that does not learn from its history is doomed to repeat it. If a nation’s history is obliterated and erased, it is hard to learn from it. That makes repeating it inevitable.

So, wake up, my “woke” countrymen. Stop defacing and vandalizing anything you take exception to. Take off the black robes of judgment that cause you to override the rule of law, usurping the authority of city and state governments, and even more importantly, the rights of your fellow countrymen. End the tyranny of you in your “wokeness” dictating to your fellow Americans what we can and can not think.

I have a proposal for all of you who think you need to erase reminders of the past in order to never feel uncomfortable about the past. Go to Germany. Look the German people in the eye. Tell Chancellor Angela Merkel that she must tear down Dachau, because it just makes you so emotional and upset, and it should not be memorialized–that her nation must not look at its past. Tell the German people that they should not have to look at any reminders of that sad and sordid time. Better yet, tell the people of Israel that.

See how that goes over. But, be sure to visit Dachau yourself and then write an essay on just what it was that the Germans were trying to “wipe out” and obliterate from human history. Please send me those essays when you return. But you must GO to Germany, not do some sophomoric internet research.

And the next time you dare deface monuments in the United States, or throw Molotov Cocktails, or tear down anything in the name of racial justice–or support those acts from the safety of your home–may I humbly suggest you actually learn enough about history to know that Matthias Baldwin was an abolitionist. That Hans Christian Heg was an abolitionist and immigrant who gave his life in the cause of freeing men. That Grant was the Union General that defeated the Confederacy. And that Lincoln was the President who ended slavery–with the help of hundreds of thousands of people, most of them soldiers whose bodies lay in fields across the Eastern seaboard. He was also President of the United States, and he paid the price of his own life to accomplish that emancipation.

Check out who “Uncle Ben” really was before you gleefully relegate him in your “wokeness” to the dustbin of history. Another black entrepreneur bites the dust if you have your way. His name was Gordon L. Harwell. He may have saved the life of your grandfather in World War 2.

And, as you send the Eskimo Pie there for the same reasons, do you actually know anything about the indigenous peoples of the North? When we love a symbol of something, we tend to learn about the history of that thing. We are curious why someone in marketing picked that symbol. I can assure you they did not do it to offend you and turn you off. They know that if you like and admire the symbol, you will want their product. The serendipity is that you also might have intellectual curiosity about the origins of the symbol. May I suggest you take this time to learn about the Eskimos and their two major tribes, languages and art?

No matter our race, I am quite confident we can decide for ourselves who we wish to like or dislike. We do not need to be railroaded and coerced into compliance with the thought process of those who sit in judgment on us all–every day, about everything in our past.

Last recommendation to my “woke” countrymen. I suggest you study the French Revolution, since you seem to despise the outcome of our American Revolution. Hint: It didn’t turn out well for Robespierre.

My Bad–CNN did cover it!

Published / by Lee Kessler / 2 Comments on My Bad–CNN did cover it!

Well, I was wrong. CNN did cover the President’s trip to India. Then all the other media sheep followed them with the exact same coverage.

Of course, CNN did not cover the purpose of the trip in any great depth or analysis. They did not cover the 110,000 excited fans in the arena, nor the reported other 100,000 people lining the streets for the motorcade, except as backdrop for the real story.

The real story according to CNN? The dietary habits of President Donald J. Trump. They decided to belittle and ridicule our President for his eating habits. They were all obsessed with what he was going to eat in India, since he likes steak. And they just couldn’t imagine that he would be able to endure the vegetarian diet that Modi would likely present to him. (Sounds a bit stereotypical to me. But then, no one is accusing these journalists of original thought or observation.)

They even had the ubiquitous “anonymous White House sources” tell them the President rarely even eats a salad. And, ignoring the trade deals, the cementing of an alliance with an ally, the potential securing of the region, they spent their time joking and demeaning.

Can you believe these folks are paid millions? As a former Human Resources and Labor Relations executive, I recommend you send every mean-spirited, shallow person you run into over to CNN to apply for a job.

They should fit right in.

So, there you have it–my official correction of my original inaccurate “reporting.”

The 110,000 person non-story

Published / by Lee Kessler / 2 Comments on The 110,000 person non-story

Today, more than half way around the world, 110,000 excited people filled the world’s largest cricket stadium. The motorcade arriving at the stadium drove through record crowds, throngs of people along the streets–many waving American flags–and deposited its occupants backstage.

Who drew such a crowd? For whom was such enthusiasm displayed? Who drew even bigger crowds than President Trump typically does in the United States?

I heard about this while driving to my yoga class this morning. I happened to turn on a morning business show to check in on what was happening business-wise when the host of the show, Stuart Varney, was lamenting the fact that there was almost no coverage of the event. He wanted to see and hear more.

But, our media was only begrudgingly commenting on this historic crowd and speechmaking. True, it occurred in the middle of the night ET, so perhaps they were just too exhausted hyping political activities here in the US to have been able to get up that early, or to stay up that late. Or perhaps they lacked the intellectual curiosity to find out why so many people were out, flag-waving, in a foreign country.

More likely they knew, but couldn’t stomach admitting the admiration the speaker was getting. Perhaps they couldn’t admit that this person is not universally hated. Perhaps the images of 110,000 cheering people in a stadium were so great a contradiction to the narrative they have told Americans for so long that they couldn’t even find words.

Some found a picture. Some may have reluctantly shown a small clip of a moment or two of the event in that stadium. Then they returned to the usual onslaught of negativity and falsehoods that we all have become accustomed to.

So, who was the visitor to India? President Donald J. Trump.

I challenge you to look it up and see what you can learn about why these people appear to love our President. You can be pretty sure you will need to ferret it out yourself.

Because if the conspiracy-theory Media has its way, you will soon be given a long list of countries that they believe are trying to interfere in our election. Any world leader who appreciates the United States and who respects our President will have to be added to the list of possible co-conspirators.

So far, we can add Prime Minister Modi of India, Prime Minister Boris Johnson of Great Britain. the Prime Minister of Canada, the President of Mexico, the Director of NATO, the President of Russia, the President of the Ukraine, the Prime Minister of Australia, the President of France, the President of Brazil, the President of Colombia, the Prime Minister of Israel, the King of Jordan, the Prime Minister of Japan, the President of China, the President of South Korea.

And the list goes on. Boy, that is an awful lot of countries who could be engaging in interference with the next election because they want to continue to work with our President!! Wow, former CIA Director John Brennan is going to be awfully busy framing all of those guys! It’s going to take the help of a whole crew of people. For sure he is going to need Comey and Clapper.

The “swamp” is going to be overworked for the next few months. This is going to be fun to watch!

Stay tuned, Director Brennan. Don’t forget “the Bloodhound” is still out there, getting closer and closer. You might want to up your doses of anti-depressant, anti-anxiety, and sleep medications.